"I guess I have a lot of problems, so many that I don't have time to go into them all in detail. Suffice it to say I'm anal, obsessive, vain, quick to temper, overly introspective, lazy, judgmental, insecure, and self-righteous. Probably the most annoying thing about me is that I'm hugely opinionated. But I kind of make up for that by always being right."

Friday, July 21, 2006

Day 46: Thanks For Writing

Because I find it hard to believe anybody reads these postings, I love getting comments on them. I even worry when certain regulars don't check in for a while. Have they grown weary of my ramblings? Have they tired of rolling their eyes thinking, "Get over yourself already"? Have they finally glimpsed that tedious and somewhat boring guy lurking behind the words?

A man wrote me yesterday confused as to how a "depressed guy without any money" could buy 400 DVDs. In the first place, I didn't buy 400 DVDs! What kind of obsessed maniac do you think I am?! I bought 426. Secondly, I shop the same way I eat hot dogs -- with great relish.

Also, depression comes in many forms. For some it involves not being able to sleep. For me, I can't get enough sleep. For some it involves not being able to eat. For me, my mouth isn't large enough to cram all of the food into it that I'd like. For some it involves not wanting to do anything. For me it's often wanting to do one particular thing to the point of obsession. In this case shopping.

As to the money, I'd just received a check for $40,000 for the sale of my beloved record collection. To take the sting out of losing these cherished bits of Americana, I'd promised myself that I could go on a little spending spree. Also, the DVDs were used and cost less the two thousand bucks. Yes, the healthy thing to do would have been to save the money and use it only for essentials until I had more money coming in. But let's face it, if I were healthy I wouldn't need this project, or this tedious and somewhat boring blog.