"I guess I have a lot of problems, so many that I don't have time to go into them all in detail. Suffice it to say I'm anal, obsessive, vain, quick to temper, overly introspective, lazy, judgmental, insecure, and self-righteous. Probably the most annoying thing about me is that I'm hugely opinionated. But I kind of make up for that by always being right."

Thursday, July 06, 2006

Day 31: To Do Or Not To Do

I can't imagine not having a to-do list. I've always had one. And it's always filled me with dread. Especially lately. I recently came across one of my lists from years ago on which many of the chores listed are still on my current list. Pathetic. One of my goals over the next five months is to eliminate this list altogether by finally -- for the first time in my life -- doing everything on it. And thereafter to take on tasks as they come up.

I realize, of course, that the anxiety created by this list is much more painful than the work it would take to complete the damned thing. But for some reason that's never seemed to matter to me. The choice was always "do the list or feel the stress." And in a weird kind of way that I can't really explain, it wasn't so much that I didn't choose to do the list, it was that stress chose me.

Anyway, here's my list. The items on it range from extremely easy to very difficult to who the fuck am I kidding? My plan is to do three of them a week until I'm free from its unholy grip.

1) start meditating 2) start Tai Chi 3) make a to-do list 4) email "fans" 5) have boys clean out drawers 6) finish record project 7) rewrite "Other People's Lives 8) clean out desk 9) clean out downstairs closet 10) give away chair 11) have house cleaned 12) start dance class 13) pay off flooring bill 14) sue Abbey Carpets 15) buy spoons & forks 16) sell broken juke box 17) fix lock on good juke box 18) make first internet TV episode 19) begin man on the street interviews 20) investigate book deal 20) fix lamp 21) fix futon 22) fix couch leg 23) paint baseboard 24) figure out sprinklers 25) do something about back yard 26) cancel ADT 27) put up picture sleeves 28) figure out multitracker 29) buy walking & cross training shoes 30) renew driver's license 31) pay July bills 32) begin film diary 33) begin exercise program 34) start regular yoga classes 35) find racketball partners 36) fix TV speaker 37) reconnect other DVD player

Hey, you know what? I've done #s 3, 12 and 29, so I'm off to a great start already!!