"I guess I have a lot of problems, so many that I don't have time to go into them all in detail. Suffice it to say I'm anal, obsessive, vain, quick to temper, overly introspective, lazy, judgmental, insecure, and self-righteous. Probably the most annoying thing about me is that I'm hugely opinionated. But I kind of make up for that by always being right."


Thursday, June 01, 2006

The Happiness Project

I’m tired of being depressed. I’m tired of feeling numb. I’m tired of eating crap and doing nothing. I’m tired of complaining. I’m tired of wallowing in self-pity. I’m tired of my life. I’m tired of me.

So I’m going to change.

Beginning Monday, June 5th, I’m embarking on a six-month journey toward happiness. And I’m doing so without the aid of drugs, God, psychiatry, spirituality, or any other touchy-feely crap. By the end of the year I plan on being mentally and physically fit, losing 65 pounds, developing skills to lead a better life, and on finding true and lasting happiness. And, God willing, finally getting laid.

The basic concept of the Happiness Project is simple –- to dedicate six months of my life toward becoming a happy person. Toward that end I’m going to stop performing my one-man show, join a health club, hire a personal trainer and a nutritionist, take yoga, dance, and martial arts classes, have my filthy house professionally cleaned, stop watching so much television, start getting out of the house more, develop a social life, meditate (without the spiritual trappings), study a lot of related subjects, take a long hike nearly every day, develop better personal habits, etc., etc., etc.

I also plan on keeping a daily journal of this journey, right here on this web site. So stay tuned.