"I guess I have a lot of problems, so many that I don't have time to go into them all in detail. Suffice it to say I'm anal, obsessive, vain, quick to temper, overly introspective, lazy, judgmental, insecure, and self-righteous. Probably the most annoying thing about me is that I'm hugely opinionated. But I kind of make up for that by always being right."

Monday, July 25, 2005


An even larger setback, however, was that I had yet to arrive at my oasis (see previous entry).

If anything, I was more miserable than ever. This got me to thinking about the very nature of happiness itself. What is it? And why does it hate me so much? Needless to say, I have no clue. But I do have a new one-man show. It's called "Happiness." It's about depression, anxiety, suicide, atheism, child abuse, infidelity, divorce and masturbation. Sure to be hailed as the "feel-good hit of the theatrical season," it will be up and running as soon as we find some rich asshole gullible enough to finance the damned thing.

In case you're wondering about the name of this Website, the Church of Rick is a religion I have invented for those of us who just can't do the whole "God" thing. I'm not entirely sure it qualifies as a religion, though, in that it doesn't involve the buggering of small boys. [More...]